Frustrated and depressed.
I should apologize for today's blog for there may be a tinge of anger attached to it. But I started this journey sharing my thoughts and emotions of my loved one's cancer journey and this is the latest.
As all of you know, my hubby has been receiving a kick in the ass Chemo therapy program and with every treatment something new happens. Over the last couple of weeks, he’s had some good outcomes along with less bad side affect and we figured, as did the oncologist, that these were positive signs. In addition his Labs were coming back good to help this belief.
Therefore, when he had his repeat scans last Thursday we were hoping to see some positive results and to make it even more angst ridden we weren’t going to get any results until today at the next chemo session. However, yesterday morning, the oncologist called him and relayed the results and to our surprise the chemo doesn’t seem to be working the way we hoped. In addition to that news,there is an immediate concern about something showing up on his spine.
We have an MRI scheduled for tomorrow to determine what this is and chemo has been halted to determine the best, if any regimen is needed. So it appears that this cancer situation has been taken out of our hopeful hands and we are simply along for the scary carnival Hell ride that this is.
It’s really starting to feel like we never really had a positive say in any of this.
Some pancreatic cells went rogue and multiplied. We got that.
The Oncologist told us that he needs aggressive chemo but he’s young enough and strong enough to withstand it. So we do it.
We were told by a few people that cancer patients see some results taking the natural herb Turmeric and after clearing this with the oncologist, Chris began taking them.
While the cancerous tumor isn’t growing and that is a positive sign in some circles (maybe all circles) it seems that there isn’t much we can do to change the circumstance or at least at this point.
He encourages that we have to give treatment more of a chance. He says we’ve only had four chemo treatments and that’s true. Perhaps it takes 12 chemo treatments to see results. I don’t know.
There really isn’t anything left at this point but hope.